Is Love Blind?

Valentine's Day is tomorrow, and love is in the air...well, for some.  If you're single like me, I suppose it's still in the air, but you're not quite embracing it like some may be.It was an interesting coincidence that a dear friend messaged me today and told me I had to check out "Love Is Blind" on Netflix.  She didn't say much beyond that, and I told her that I definitely would. I actually expected that it was a movie.  However, it is a show.  A reality show.Yes, I know...collective groan.  Up until recently, I wouldn't be caught dead watching a reality show...and then my friend Shawna introduced me to The Circle.The Circle was billed as a social experiment competition that was based solely on social media. Players had to build popularity amongst their opponents, with their only interactions being through a social media program called The Circle.  The show itself was a rare feel-good show where you even found yourself cheering for the occasional "catfish" amongst the players.  If you haven't seen it, I definitely recommend you go check it out.Love Is Blind is also billed as a social experiment.  However, it takes a complete 180 from The Circle.  It's a dating game.  However, you don't ever see the people you're dating.Actually, let's take it a step further.  The contestants have 10 days of dating, having nothing but their voices to connect them. No pictures, no silhouettes...just a voice.  The idea being that this will allow the people to meet, mingle, and ideally make true intimate emotional connections, with, as one contestant put it,

"Removing the confounding variables of ethnicity, race, background, and physical appearance."

All with the goal of finding the special someone that they want to marry.  From there, at the end of the 10 days, they have the opportunity to propose to the person that they want to marry.  From there, they meet, a wedding date is set, and they have approximately a month to go from strangers to newlyweds.This shows premise struck me as super creepy as I heard hosts Vanessa & Nick Lachey lay them out.Can you fall in love in 10 days?  Would you agree to marry someone sight unseen?Wow...stop and think about that for a moment.  If you stop and look at all of the dating apps that are popular right now...looks...the goods...are at a premium. I remember first hearing about Tinder, and how "revolutionary" it was perceived as because it said fuck all the about me sections and went with just the looks.Does judging a book by its cover impede true emotional connection?  Do physical appearance, ethnicity, race, and all that jazz...impede love?I suppose it depends on who you ask.  Two of the more endearing characters on the show are Lauren and Cameron.  Cameron is from Maine, and Lauren is from Detroit.  Their conversation starts with the Lauren mentioning that she doesn't think she's ever met someone from Maine.As the various conversations continue, you discover that people have, admittedly, dated a very small sliver of the dating pool, whether that was due to age, height, race...what possibilities exist if we move beyond these things, and simply connect with another persons personality?I find the show, and its premise so intriguing.  I took notes, and found myself saying "aww" way more than a 40 year old man probably should doing anything, but I found myself thinking "Have I ever cried on a date?"The answer is hell naw, because that's not what's Gucci...right?As I watched the episode, I found myself reflecting on the fact that there is so much that goes into a date, or dating, and so much of it has nothing to do with the real point; making a genuine emotional connection with someone who will be there through thick and thin and hopefully hold your hand when you die. That has nothing to do with big boobs, or a full head of hair, or a beard, or even a bank account.Ladies, them big bank account motherfuckers will run out on you in a minute.Ok.  Soap box put aside.In my notes, I wrote down,

"The next breakthrough app will undoubtedly be a blind dating app that also successfully explores true emotional intimacy between people."

Which, as I thought more about it, actually harkens back to the America Online chat room days.One of my favorite people in my teens years was a woman named Raven.  We talked daily, initially in a AOL chat room, and eventually in ICQ (who remembers that chat app).  She was a bit wild, she was a bit crazy, and she was dying.  Slowly. Of cancer.  Eventually we went from chatting online to phone calls.  Her marriage was shit before the cancer, and hadn't improved after. She missed sex a lot.  She was a little wild, and a little crazy, and sometimes a little scared that she wouldn't beat her cancer.  One day, she simply stopped popping up online. She didn't beat her cancer, but in the meantime, we achieved a genuine emotional connection.Perhaps, the next great innovator will figure out how to achieve that essence...without photos?How important are looks to you when sizing up a potential partner?  Would you be willing to have a series of dates with someone sight unseen? Could you marry a person without ever seeing them, even if emotionally and personality wise, you match up great? I'd love to hear any and all thoughts down below in the comment section. Also, have you checked out my podcast? The show is Off The Beaten Podcast. You can find the show on Apple Podcast, Stitcher, Spotify, or on our website. Who knows, maybe this topic will pop up over there. Also, follow us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter to see the sights of the city and what’s going down. Also, if you’re so inclined, Sign up to get Off The Beaten Podcast in your inbox.